I am loosing it

I am not sure if a lot of you can relate to this, but I am definitely loosing it. My English. It’s unbelievable. The grammar/ “sentence structure” is so different, quite the opposite even, if you compare German and English with one another. Therefore my “blogging” entrees sound so hilarious. Even this sentence. It’s hard and sometimes I ask myself, how am I going to fit even another language inside of that blonde curly head of mine? Then I translate my English toughts into German and the Germans laugh, cause it sounds quite hilarious.
The language barier is one thing, but I also feel that I have lost something else.
I am not going to lie, it’s quite hard being here in Germany. Everything is fine, but I left it behind for a reason, I think. I wanted to start a new different life because “my old one” in Germany wasn’t the best fitting one for me. I wanted to create a better one, find different cultures and more. One that fits to me. And maybe it is even myself that has changed and molded into someone else, I hate to say this but I feel like I have grown out of my German times. It doesn’t seem like me anymore, its not enough, its just not my size anymore. I lost a bit of my Germanself.
I hate to be so judgmental and nag, but I look around and I find that there is a lot of things that I started to like in the US rather then how its done in Germany. Everyone smokes here and it doesn’t seem to bother anyone, but me. My hair stinks, my clothes and even my mouth taste like smoke. I feel that Americans in some ways, are more health oriented, and I feel that I have grown into a person, that really cares for it. I rarely find any parties interested in my “health conversations”. Another thing is that no one is friendly. Of course with my “American way”, it seems to charm them to be happy.(of course the people can be friendly , but some chose not to because why should they?, cut yourself a piece from American customer service and use it, I strongly recomand it) Like this one table said: “I can tell that you had spend a long time in the US, because you have a very nice Oar to yourself. You are very kind and friendly”. I have been observing a lot and just… I guess I keep finding things to nag on. There I ask myself: How do you take the brutal right to be so judgmental? Sometimes I am discussing in my head if I am picky, or righteous to say so, or simply a stuck up brad that can’t live a different way then hers wishingly made-up in her head. (Do I need to be send into the exile to leave a life worth complaining about?)
I know this is a lot of insight. A lot of thoughts. But has anyone else been in a situation like this?! I feel like I lost it all, I gave up everything. And now I compromise with my worsen English, my lifestyle I enjoyed and other things like Someone who I became. I feel that I am challenged and looking at it from the outside perspective I really see the positive in it. Well no, it actually is really even a reason I came here for, now thinking of it. It is myself. Finding who I am. What will make me happy. I bet, you all are asking yourselves of why I am even concerned about Germany. If I don’t like it, why not just leave it beehind. Well like I said, I am loosing it- I don’t know where home is. It is very interesting because I put this theory onto a friend of mine, who had the same views of it. I like this about the US, I also disagree on this. Then Germany has many good perspectives in this view, but bad on this one or more. Spain I love the lifestyle, but… ect.
It’s funny because she is in the same triangle as I- Germany, USA and now coming Spain..We asked each other where home is: We both replied, well only the future will tell!
 I also hate to say this but I am afraid this journey will make me even more lost of were I belong, what if I love Spain and will disagree onto the good ole US. Therefore I really ask myself: Does the experience of culture in young ages build you to who you are. And what if? - Do we get spoiled by the great advantages of every countries unique Flavor? And do we not want to compromise afterall anymore? -Is there an "dream" country, to find?
As I am a… , or lets say, trying always to be a optimist- For this journey, I pray for a lot of optimism, joy and adventurisms. But also most of all insight into myself and into faith of god. So I take every heartache as a pulse beating for more. Every wanted tear as a drop of sweat for courage. And every thought of regret or second thoughts of a sign that life was to comfortable and I needed a challenge.

Winter Wonderland

It has been such a great  Winter. Who could ask for more a White Christmas. It was stunning beautiful everywhere..

Everything was frosted, This is my Backyard in Germany.


On The 24th, the Holy Night, we started decorating the tree. Well I did...

Pretty in Purple not even Santa could resist the tree

Then I decorated our Dining table, Jerusalem Style :).. I love Christmas

The Crib...

I wrapped the presents...

We ate Raqulet, you roast, cheese, veggies, bacon , potatoes and more in a little pan, not to forget this beautiful homemade cake! I missed German bakeries and cakes

Christmas was an amazing time. We went to the Christmas market and drank Wine with cinnamon and more seasonings, which is heated up, we call it glowing wine (Gluehwein)

The city...

Like I said, It has been a wonderful time, I have been getting appointments to serve, I have been relaxing, I sure have been eating :) I have been running into old, some even strange, supprising acquaintances, and am reminded of the old teenage hood, But I really am excited to start a new total unknown experience. It's time for my new History. History i can make in Spain and elsewhere.
I have some thoughts of what to do during New Years (Silvester, which we Germans call it, is a huge day of the year and I think it would be just splendid to take this opportunity to celebrate my journey, what do you think?)), well first I wanted to be boring and just stay put ( I can't lie). But this is an journey, an experience, don't be afraid, grab the opportunity by its arm before its too late. So I am, Be surprised! Stay tuned

Let it snow, Let it snow

It couldn’t be any prettier. You know these little ginger houses? Well imagine a bunch of Ginger houses in a row and some snow frosted trees, little sugar frosting side walks and colorful icing as the font of the houses.. It is stunning and breath taking how beautiful it looks outside.
Little foot print, cat prints and dog prints in the snow. I couldn’t have asked for a more perfect weather right before Christmas time. It is something so special. I finally feel like its Winter.

I hear a lot of People complain and a lot of news articles/ news reports in television saying that this is a very hard winter and that so many flights had to be stopped and had to shut down almost the entire airports all over in Europe. Germany, France, London and more. An this had been going on since the last 2 weeks, I came right on the day were it was less snow, but the day after every flight had to be cancelled. (So much to great timing right,smile)

(quite the chaos in Frankfurt)

It even snowed in Greece and they just can’t handle it. I am not sure if some greeks have ever seen snow (no seriously)
I have been really enjoying the weather.
So far I am enjoying it very much in Germany as well. I work for 3 hours at the most 2-3 days a week. The job is easy, since Germans don’t really focus on customer service, they just want to be left alone when they eat. And the will tell ya when the want another drink or shot, or beer, refills aren’t free, so its great. Serving compared From US and Germany, well.. Loving it I can’t lie. And then a lot of relaxing the rest of the days.
Today I ate this beautiful meal with my parents at the restaurant I am employed at:
We got started of with Good German Bread and “Schweine schmalz” which is a flavored pig belli extract and it had bacon bits in it too. Delicious

Marone Soup

Then we ate this beautiful colorful salad

(I can’t tell you how delicious it was and how absolutely beautiful, just so diverse) (unfortunately I won’t get my Camera until Santa clause, or since I am in Germany the Christ child stops by on the 24^th, so I am really trying to have pictures that look as accurate as possible. I promise it will be right on time for the most beautiful time in Germany. Christmas-Weihnachten.)

Then following with the main course “Paniertes Wienerschnitzel with Spaetzle a German nuddle.

(believe me the plate looked exactly like this one but imagine twice the portion, twice the nuddles and two Wiener schnitzel, which is a pork that is country fried, I had way too much leftovers.)
Okay and the price for this made to order made from scratch everything was 13 euros. Compare that to USA that was quite the awesome meal for a good price thinking that it probably will be my dinner, lunch and dinner again.
It was quite fun.
When I first got here I was wondering how I would even get in contact with any of my old friends but I really didn’t have to do much, the second I walked in my house coming from the airport, one friend called, right 1 minute after that another did and right before we went to dinner today, my neighbor showed up and rang the bell. It's great. It's really great to see my old friends. But I also Can’t wait to have a new, newer, and the very  newest experience in Spain, with no personal history …
Stay tuned..!

leaving it beehind, 1st day away

Well everyone. I am definitely back (home) in Germany. Everywhere I look there is a German  that smokes and drinks. My flight was pretty looong. I sat in that airplane for almost 12 hours. And not to forget. When I checked into my flight I asked where my reserved seat was. "Mam, I am sorry but we do not have any reservations for you." Comes that they had made a mistake and reserved that seat under a miss spelled name. With my luck I had to sit in between two men. One that kept coughing and snorting buggers out and the other well, he was a bid strange, but we had pretty good conversations going. (my first German I had spoken in a while).He told me about his first love that he had lost 30 years ago. He was from Afghanistan and explained that everyone left that country like a volcano spits fire and stones, basically saying that everyone ended up in a different country and different place. I guess there was a war and the Russians had taken over the country and it was a horrible time. So this man continues to tell me that, (yes believe it or not) got a facebook with his 40 years old and typed in her name, and BAM; There she was his first love. It was a quite touching story. They got back into talking to each other and this was the second time that he had visited her in Las Vegas. He almost cried and said that he misses her so much already and that he doesn´t want to leave her back again. They had met when he was 23 and she was 18. Very cute-but, yes there is a but... this man tells me that he is married and has children. I didn´t dare asking if the wife knew, but he had told me that they haven´t been happy since the last 4 years. I really find it sad that married couples give up on one and another. I pray that one day I will find that man that will make happy and will never stop loving me (sounds like a fairytale, but I guess we all have wishes right) I just don´t believe in divorce. But yeah, very interesting story.

SOOO, My first day in Germany looked like this:

-Got picked up by my mum,

-Eat some yummy to my tummy Chinese food

-Started working (yes, can you believe my workaholic self right back into it no sleep and nothing)

(old picture of their sign)

(laugh I work in a German restaurant which translates into "To The Ostrich" and those German co-workers where yelling and complaining, insanely much. One thing I love is that everything was made from scratch and those plates looked so delicious, of course everything was made to order. Very cool)

-was super tired

-hung out with my bestest girls (after getting off at 11 pm), Lili and Charlene in our favorite Bar

-and ended that day late at 4 in the morning at home.

-ate some homemade lasagna with my mum (yes she is a night bird too)

-Sleep, the happy end

It was a pretty good start, I got a little emotional when I had left the airport in Germany and was looking around and saw and finally realized that I was in a different Country( it snowed and it was a wonderland of snow, super beautiful, anyways)

, I cried a few tears, I do miss him already dearly. But as soon as those tears came out I quickly shook them out and said to myself, "this is my journey, this has nothing to do with anyone but me. So cut it out Andrea Catherine and be excited for a new journey, full of surprises and new experiences and a path that I need to take. My path finding God.

My Life is packed away

Well ya’ll I am officially leaving Las Vegas ground in 25 1/4 Hours. Did I ever mention that I was a procrastinator? Well, there you got it: I am. Today’s activity overview:
-packing
-moving out of my apartment
-cleaning apartment
-run my last 15 errands
-call and cancels
-saying bye
-And hopefully a little Relaxation
Sounds like an action packed day doesn’t it? Well, It’s been hard knowing that this is it, its final, its my last day. The previous days I have felt a bit nervous but also super exciting at the same time . Awe I finally finished packing. Can I tell you that there has been nothing more frustrating. I already had to buy an extra bag allowance and am still struggling with just 2 suitcases; I am trying to smuggle a “heavier” hand baggage, a backpack and my laptop on board as my “hand baggage’s“ , praying that no one will say anything.. Come on, who can fit there closet into 3 small suitcases/ 120 lbs worth? ( That is another me, as a person, seeing it on the weight sight) that sucks. Or is it just me I am wondering. Would a man take less things with them or even you? Well everyone, this is IT, my journey begins, my life is packed away in 3 suitcases. ( can you believe my next blog will be in Germany?) love you all!

Mr. CJ.. Some ways to feel at home.

I have lived in many places, different families/ Roommates and just all together have moved a bunch. One thing that had always warmed up the moving experience is to unpack all these happy, known and memory filled items. If its just a blanket you like or pictures of family, friends and vacations or some candles or art pieces- decorating my room with personal items has always been my favorite tradition after a stressful move. All your personal items will make it so much easier to feel home more quickly.
Well despite my long and far journey, unfortunately I am not aloud to take a lot of baggage with me. So most things will be staying in the United States. But I have great plans when I land in Germany. I will buy some lamps, some beading, some picture frames and more to bring with me to Spain. You got to understand that I will be leaving with a Family I don’t really know and to avoid not feeling comfortable, It will be awesome to bring some Items you like, to make your own space (that your family has offered) comfortable. So I will do. But there just was one thing, I didn’t know how to cope with. Of course This is not the ultimate coping device, but I know it will help me out quite some. Chauncey/ my boyfriend, that I am leaving behind/ we will be moving our own directions/ meaning he’ll be my ex-boyfriend/ complicated story (lot’s of slashes right?) Anyhow, okay I know I haven’t gotten into this subject quite much. It is quite difficult and will probably take up its own “post” to even explain, but for now maybe lets leave it at this : It is complicated, but yes we will stay friends kind of relationship. So I was walking through Wal mart and found this pillow/animal. It is quite cute. But it really spoke to me because it had so many similarities to my Boy friend. Big Huge smile, Big nose, small eyes and small ears. Super cute, I think it looks part sheep part monkey, but really it’s a monkey ,anyways. It’s cute and cuddly. Its silly too, the idea, I know. But sometimes even the feel of having someone there, like a cat or dog, or even just a plush animal just might make it not so lonely!. Laugh… very silly I know, but deep down I think its genius! His name is to be still figured out.. CJ, stands for Chauncey JR, but I will probably go with something that doesn’t combine his name in. So far I love coconut! (do we all have a child in us?) .. So what do you think, does it help you coping from “heimweh/being home sick” having pictures/ memories or even just something you like in a room?

Mr Cj, aka coconut, I named him finally... (I know aren't I silly :P)

The news from the news paper

So guys... here is the police/ news paper report I guess this was a big deal in my town... men oh men, poor guy.. but yeahhh... got some details from my little poor scotter being totaled....

 

High-speed chase ends at St. George apartment building

Published: December 05. 2010 11:48AM

ST. GEORGE – A St. George man was booked into jail Saturday night after leading police on a high-speed chase on the freeway, on busy city streets and into an apartment complex.

The Utah Highway Patrol and Arizona Department of Public Safety responded to a report of reckless driving on Interstate 15 near Littlefield shortly after 10 p.m., and started following a Chevrolet pickup truck at mile marker 24 in the Gorge.

UHP Sgt. Dan Ferguson said the truck was veering wildly, exhibiting one of the worst driving patterns he’d seen in 26 years of experience.

“It was the most atrocious driving I’ve ever seen,” he said.

The driver, 21-year-old (edited: young man), continued driving wildly but avoiding collisions all the way to Exit 8 in St. George, where he avoided a St. George Police Department road block and turned onto St. George Blvd. going west on the eastbound lanes, Ferguson said.

Hernandez avoided several vehicles before crashing into two Dixie State College Police vehicles that officers were trying to use to block the way near the St. George Blvd. and 1000 East intersection.

From there, Hernandez reportedly was able to continue driving to his apartment building at 545 S. 900 East, where he struck another vehicle, ran over a scooter, and finally stopped next to the front door of his home.

Before he could exit the vehicle, police caught up to him.

“We ended up just pulling him out of the truck and putting him on the ground and handcuffing him,” Ferguson said.

There was damage to the two DSC police vehicles and the two vehicles in the apartment parking lot, but no major injuries.

Hernandez was charged with multiple violations, including driving under the influence, evading police and leaving the scene of an accident. He was booked into Purgatory Correctional Facility on $7,850 bail.

Ferguson said (edited: the you men) would also likely face charges in Arizona.

Well, unfortunate fortunes

So, to make my last 10 days even more nerve racking. I came home from work with 3 cop cars standing in my parking lot, Full out lights and everything. So there I was having my Sister in law trying to reach me about “what happened” and then this?- So my scoter was totaled and not in the place I had parked it last.
Finding out. I guess there was a drunk driver, that the policemen had been chasing for about 20 minutes long down the free way, until he finally had made it home into his apartment complex. Apparently this man was so drunk that he didn’t realize the 5 cop cars had been chasing him. So he swung into the parking lot almost tipped his own pick-up truck, hit a parked car and ran into my scoter with high speed, it skid 15 feet far. My poor scoter is a mess. The back is totally messed up, its leaking gasoline, the body is broke from about every angle you look at it, lights are hanging out from the back and front. Yes, quite the thing. So on top of my stressful move out of the country, I got to deal with all the insurance companies. GRRR… I am not even sure I will have everything settled until my move. So I guess this means: Get on top of it and on top of them if needed. To the drunk driver: Well he’s my next door neighbor, Probably going to be in jail for quite some time, after not only just hitting my scoter, the car next to it and a police car down the road while drunk driving and being chased and eventually being a safety hazard for others. (did I mention that I think I live in St. Georges’ ghetto, which isn’t a ghetto for real, but lets just say it like this -It’s St. Georges’ finest that lives here, ya’ll know what I mean, even the Jehovah Witnesses that stop by don’t speak my language) Anyways….
To all my drama or I guess in all my fortune I haven’t giving it my very best to be on time at my job. I mean I got to find rides which I try hard. (But I could have found them maybe 5 h before work instead of an hour.) So last Night I got send home as soon as I got to work, because I was 15 minutes late. (It really is my fault.) I guess I just got to start walking myself an hour before I got to be at work and not rely on stupid rides. (That’s my statement. ) But it’s just sooo frustrating because I am ready on time and don’t mean to be late… And it’s so much more to take on. An yelling and frustrated boss, I always have to deal with, when finding a stupid ride. It feels quite.. Frustrating! Especially since I really wanted a good reference from this job.
I guess… Well there ya‘ll got it .. One more thing to get resolve, one more lost “money chance” (money I desperately need)… very frustrating!
Mood and Challenge Prospective for the next week: Lightly stressful with a front of wining, but will clear up eventually with a warming sunshine coming from my significant other, dissolving these challenging (burned out) moods swings from north-west and will leave everyone with a bright sunshine!
(Any who, Anyhow …did I mention that I have found a solution to not feel “unloved” in Spain anymore? Since I guess I will be leaving my love behind?.. Well I will tell ya’ll this in my next post ;) stay tuned)
(pictures will follow)

My first goodbye...

(sorry it took me so long to post again... a lot has happened, stay tuned to find out about the drunk driver, my scotter and I)


Well my sweet little friends over at my Restaurant job decided to through me a goodbye party.
It was surreal and I still don’t even believe that I will be leaving in 11 days. That is less then 2 weeks. Wow. (It gave me quite a tug in my stomach just thinking it.) Believe it or not, I am nervous. But I truly have not been this happy in a long time. I am finally focusing on just me. Yes of course I still have my goals that I am trying to achieve, but it is a total balance! -…no side is overly loaded.
Well it is quite fascinating seeing different views on my planned ADVENTURE. I mean, some people said the wish that they could just up and go and leave. They say, wouldn’t it be fun to be young again and to leave too. It seems like that my plans are inspiring people to live life and do something crazy. Then there are the other kinds that are quite frightened. They ask me were I get my courage from to move to a different country. Well first of all: US is not my home country. This country is still very unknown to me. I am too scared to move to a different city in the U.S.(I mean you hear about crazy gangs and stories, being a woman on my own is quite scary. You got to watch were you leave, its more expensive then, you have to live on the top floor ect…. But I think Barcelona will give me a nice preparation for my future. Especially since Barcelona is know to be the “New York” of Europe and is a huge city) . One other factor is that I currently live in a very safe environment like St. George. I consider my house a bit in the “ghetto”. Which in Utah terms just means: no one speaks English in my Apartment complex. But I feel safe. People are friendly. Anyways back to my theme. So moving to Spain I will actually have a lot of more safety cushions . My mum lives just a 30 Euro Flight away. So I am strong and encouraged. I am excited. Unfortunately its hard to see that some people in my “other” side of the Family are not so happy about my decision. They were talking about crazy, crazy things. Like rapist and of course with my great history of “horrible” family connections and drama in the past (which even goes quite further then my own life) there is some more blames and pointed finger onto me. I finally realized that it isn’t about them. It’s about me. I want to experience life like this. So I got to do what I got to do. Leave these blames behind and be excited.
Well it is tough saying goodbye. It really is, But the toughest is yet to come: My love.. My boyfriend. But that is another story… Stay tuned.

Eat, Pray, Love… Let’s talk inspiration people…

Alright, alright.. I guess I do have an inspiration.
2 things, well 2 beautiful people… Julia and Elizabeth Gilbert, Author of the #1 New York Times Bestseller “Eat, Pray, Love”, also recently filmed and brought out with (who could be better) Miss beautiful smile Julia Roberts. (this is not the Julia of my inspiration)
Okay lets talk Julia, aka miss Coco sister. My beautiful friend. I was about 15 years when I met miss Doreen. She and her Family had gone to the same school and lived in the same suburb as I for as long as I remember. When we teen girls started liking the same boy, we became quickly friends. She is great and we became very good friends ( “those friends your parents wish you never made, because the telephone bill was sky rocking high“ kind of friends) well, she has this wonderful older sister Julia. She has been one of these people that no matter how long we hadn’t talked for, we would never ever run out of material to talk about. Julia graduated from High School and did an internship in Spain. Wooow, how cool is that, (thinking with my adventuress young 15 years old) I wanted to do it too. For all I have known I tried to get her sister to agree on an exchange like that, after we would have graduated. Well life doesn’t just happen the way ya’ would like (Like I had mentioned in my blog before, right?). I decided to take on my faith in the US and moved away from everyone and everything. Julia has been a great friend I kept in touch with and pored my heart out at times, talked to hear about my success and things that were finally running. I always admired her. She had moved from Spain back to Germany, to Germany to Alabama (She went to school/college while doing all this, very admirable) then New York, Germany, Almost Brazil (I guess it didn’t work out) and now she is in New York again. Where did she get the courage to do this all on her own. Well I want to do it too. One day. Ever since I was 15 years old I knew that this was on my bucket list: Move to either Spain or Italy for a year, two or more.
Now to my secondary and final inspiration. Eat, Pray, Love. Honesty, I didn’t know there was a book out that did this/ had similar plans. I read the book and fell in love. This lady had never really found herself and never found what she really wanted from life. She was taken by the mentality of life: “I guess this is what everyone else would do” mentality. She was depressed, frustrated and finally left her Husband after several years of marriage. After that relationship, she went into the next one. (She never seemed like she was quite happy on her own.) So she was super depressed, met a guru, met a medicine man, in her case this was her inspiration and made plans to move overseas for a year.(since I am not writing a book report, I will not tell ya’ much more… this is for you to read) But how cool is this. This book had my heart beating. I didn’t know that there were more people like me and goals like this and all in all, she is an grown up woman.
Well, I had quite the ruff time here in the US. But people everywhere go through struggles and troubles. So I don’t try to self pity myself. I have worked 3-2 jobs (just about every day) and have been used to this ever since I had known to be on my own. It’s hard to support yourself by these “baby jobs”. We call this a typical burn out, short on temper, hard to see things positive, frustrated at work and more symptoms. A life that wasn’t worth living. 2012-the movie…(why did I ever watch this Movie?) Well, I guess it brought me closer to my goal.( Let’s stay structured I don’t mean to get ya’ll confused here, are ya’ll still with me?) So 2012 the movie. If you hadn’t seen it, well it’s a movie about the earth going down in 2012. I had never been more scared. This world had actually an expiration date.? On top of that I had been going to this church. Let me tell ya, he was not shy about talking “revelations”… Revelations: time has been going by faster, quicker, it is coming: the judgment will be coming, he said.
Everywhere I was going they just dwelled on my fear. Okay don’t get me confused, when the Erath goes down, well then it will go down. There is just nothing we can do about it, BUT please tell me… All this hard work I was doing, all this straight forward focus towards achieving goal, more goals, get school started, work, work and more work (“can you pick up a shift for me, yes of course always“- kind of hard working work) fun?-what’s that. I was an absolute devoted hard working goal achiever. I had no fun, no life worth living. So that got me thinking of what I am doing wrong… It is not the destination that defines our life’s- it is journey that takes us there. BAM BOM BAM, I had never seen clearer ,ever I mean ever. Guess what, I have never been happier either. I am finally, finally over my frustrations and bad pasts, because I have a life worth living? So let me ask you this: Have you ever been caught up and focused to hard to straight forward, that you had been forgetting to live life the fullest?

Thee struggles n' troubles

Alright now. I don’t consider myself one of these lucky going, nothing wrong, always smooth riding people. I guess that could have 2 reasons: First, well maybe I am just not made to be this lucky. Second of all: Well I can’t deny that I have been told I am rather a pessimist. Well sorry people. That glass just looks half empty not half full. But the kind of girl I am, I really must say, I really try to improve. This is why I love meeting people and new cultures. Adapting the best things out of what you learn. I truly believe people can change, but you really just have to be up for it. I really want to mold into this infinite person. Always striving to be and do better. Anyways, for now I am still going to look at this glass a little emptier.(Smile)
Getting everything ready for this big move wasn’t easy. I had found my Au pair Family around August. Maybe I should call myself lucky, because I had this great, great Family that really did want me too. Actually I had about 100 people from Italy and Spain wanting me as their little Au pair. Well, I guess my profile just stood out ;). So first thing after I had really considered this plan and made the final decision: I put my car for sale around the end of September. Well, to my surprise, I actually had a lot of calls and interests. In the first week. Can you believe it? In this economy? Alright, (Alright maybe I am luckier then I think) Unfortunately my car had driven over a huge tire while driving on the free way. Which when I was going through my process of getting my baby car sold, turned out to be a leak in my GAS TANK. Oh goodness, 550 turtles dumped into a repair, that I wasn’t even getting anything out off. Gosh not to forget my crazy buyer that happened to be a co-workers ex- brother in law. Apparently the had an alcohol problem and struggles with “power entitlement”. It was quite a frustrating process and I felt like he made everything harder then he had too. Pay pal.. Ya’ know, It’s all good until ya’ have this crazy buyer trying to get a car sold in a week. (You have to wait anywhere from 2-3 days for each little process on Pay pal.) I got to say this though. God never takes more struggles up on me that I can’t handle and in times like these when things where hard and frustrating I turn to him, and ask for strength and endurance.
So after having sold my car. Well what was I going to do for my ride? I mean I have still 3 months left here. LUCKILY (do you like how I pronounce this), my sister in law is such a sweetheart, She let me use her scooter. (I mean she can’t carry her new born on there, right). You know, I really was quite the attraction on that cute thing. I had been flirted with, smiled at, even had seen people I hadn’t in 2 years. So I absolutely adored it. Poor scooty, one cold Autumn day, well it just didn’t sound the same. The poor battery had given its last. Okay well now I didn’t have rides anymore. I car pool to one of my jobs, luckily, and to the other one: it happens to be closer to my house then I thought, so I go on nice walks these days. It is all good and nice.
Lastly, I have been working and working and working, to pay of bills, credit cards, remaining everything’s, so I can have a clean move from the states. So happens to turn out serving is just not that, How shall I word this, not so reliable. Economy is down, well Oprah W. my friend, she had to tell everyone that servers just should only be tipped 10 % in this bad economy. Honey did you do your research? Because we poor servers in Utah and about another couple of states only get an hourly wage of stunning $ 2,13. Ya, tell me is that sad or what. To clear this up, everyone else makes minimum wage. So thanks Oprah: what do people call this effect again. Oh ya the Oprah W. effect. My tips are 10 %ters now more often rather then 20 %ters, which I don’t want to be cocky, but my tables adore me ;). ( I challenge that lady to come serve, cause we do a heck of a job, now since the economy is down and companies are saving, we have to do a lot of a heck more, buss table(so they don’t have to pay a busser), make your salads, and a heck of a load of side work. Alright Oprah, are you ready to work for $2.13 an hour, let me know)
Well, now it has become super slow at that serving job. I come in at 3.45 pm and get cut 5.45. It has been very, very, very frustrating, because I have about 1 ½ weeks left of work and haven’t even paid all my bills off yet. And I had quit my other job already , so I would be able to start packing and so on. Happens to be, I guess, I am just a lucky one, that my boss is a sweetheart too, and let me work another week. Hopefully I will be able to pay my bills and safe a penny or two, eventually a dime. Cause I really would like to learn Spanish in a school. ( I need a crash course/ Intensive program to get me going) Well, like ya’ll can see, I am luckier then I think, this path had been rather smooth riding , now repeating it in words. I should feel blessed and happy to have gotten things running this smoothly. Endurance… that’s what is hard and just a great thing to have. Tell me do you ever feel like troubles and struggles overcome you? Or are you rather a happy sailors man?

The beginning of leaving everything BEEhind

How exciting- this is my official first blog. I am a “new bee” at this. ( Okay, okay, please don’t navigate away, I promise people, you’ll love it.*wonder* At least my tables I serve just can’t stop asking me questions about my fun adventure I have planned.) Where to start?
Well one day at a time, I guess: Since I have about 16 days until my adventure starts maybe I should start at the beginning.
I grew up in Germany, I lived there until I was about 16 years old with my mum and step dad . Now I have been in the United States since already 4 ½ years. Well at first I lived with my Dad in the United states, for about the first 3 months. That was until this living situation became very complex, difficult and quite the drama. I grew up to become my own young woman, I bought my own car, got my life structured in a unknown country, I have two great jobs and my own apartment that I will be leaving behind as well. And my great friend/ my boyfriend that has been such a support. It has not always been easy and there had been times I wanted to quit, but I did well from becoming homeless to who I am now: A young, classy & independent woman. And I am still seeking to have more faith and become my own best person that I can possible be….
….To my fun plans and adventure. Being in the U.S. and living their ways, I have found a lots of ups and downs. Great things and not so great things. All in all who can say that they moved with nothing and got out so much. I am very happy for this experience. I bet you are asking yourself: Why is she moving? Well , Utah is a very pretty place. I would visit and love it every time I’d come again. But, there is just not so much diversity. And I really would also like to be closer to family. (US vs. Spain- Spain is definitely closer to Germany). So- why am I not moving back to Germany. Well I love the experience of moving. There is nothing greater then new foods, new people, new language (you speak three languages wooow) anyways. So many opportunities to learn, so many great things to gain. Alright, well my goal for this year of 2011 was definitely to start school/college. I just really, really wanted to have a more fun way to experience it. And don’t ask me how but: Spain, Barcelona. I found myself an Au pair Family there. The mum is German, the dad is Spaniard, the girls are cute 10 y and 12 y old. Barcelona is known to be the “New York” of Europe. So I am excited. And hopefully I will be excepted at the Utah state University, then everything will be perfect. ( I am planning on taking online classes through them)
Now my daily routine is: Work, Work, pack and lots of errands before I leave. And of course not to forget all the goodbyes. But I will tell you more about this later.
This is just the start, there is more to come, I am excited to let you join me on this experience to Spain. Time limit to how long I will be there. Not sure :o)
(…..Stay tuned)

Some of my sweets I will have to say bye too. My friend Carly aka CC