Last words

Well I am not showered barely finsihed packing, (1 1/2 h before needing to leave) after trying at least 10 times to take out more stuff to get 3 kilos less... I am traveling with 10 kilo hand luggage that's it... horribleee.. But ya'll just let me tell ya I am ready to go... sun, beach and ocean!!! 2 month of adventuring.. Mallorca, Barcelona, Irland, Germany and my plan is: not to use internet all that often, so I do not think I will be posting before September again! Sorry ya'll... I love you and we'll see each other soon! besitoooos

By the way have I mentioned my birthday is tomorrow?! sweet 22 :o)

bienvenido Pariiiis

adeuuu, pariiis

Lovely Barcelona nights

Memories that are lasting <3

What crappy weather!

So ever since I have been in Germany the weather has been driving me nuts! Literally.  It has been raining and raining and raining. No sun, I have been cold… Well okay I think of 7 weeks being here there might have been 2 okay weeks with no rain, Still I cant wait to leave! Literally…
What crappy weather!

Flights are booked and I am ou so excited for the adventures ahead of me…
Let me tell ya:
Starting of one week vacation in Barcelona 21th July-27th July with my sweet friend! I am so excited, finally some sun and playaaa... then
Palma de Mallorca (Espana) 4^th of August until 14^th of September
I will be working as a promoter for clubs, selling tickets, inviting students to come party.
Well I get a room for 10 euros a day, I will live right by the beach and can enjoy some sun and working out by the beach.. Great I am ou so excited. I have never been on an Island so I am excited!!

14^th of September until 22^nd of September Vacation in my ouuuh so loved Barcelona. I will say good bye to the peeps and folks and enjoy some vacation and some more pictures of my Corazon Barcelona… J doesn’t that sound amazing?

22^nd till the 28^th of September… Ireland
I am so excited I get to visit my Godmother (which listen up has the same career I am going into school for, I am super excited) Ireland must be gorgeous and so different I cannot wait!

28^th till the 4 of October Alemania, Germany
Saying goodbye to friends and family ;) Packing to get ready to go HOME!

(maybe 1-2 days in Italy I am not sure, But I would love to fly to Rome and eat some Italian dishes, and just had been there!)

After my Baby Europe tour…
followed by my beloved home - USA October 4^th
 

　
I am super excited and will keep you updated! ….
For now I got a couple of promotion jobs to do here J
Hasta prontooo
　

Hasta luego, besitos 　
　

The German ways-

Hello guys,
Woow it’s been over a month since I had posted last. ( I am ashamed) Too my excuse, there is none but that I felt busy and was trying to emotionally sort all of the happenings. It’s been busy: Working, more working, helping my mum move, grandma time, friends time, my brother and his family came to visit so I made time, and then getting ready to go back to BARCELONA…. Well I am sitting here and have the time of the world. My brother is gone, my parents, the 2 dogs are sleeping and snoring and dreaming right beneath my knees. So It couldn’t be any better timing to tell you about the new drama and new plans.
What a pity I can only say…..
To start the story off. I went and left the house 4 days after the last post. It was too much, I got money to drive down and took the opportunity. I had some South Americans that I said goodbye too, which all the sudden our conversation was evolving about them joining me on the ride. Well why not that 16 hour drive is harsh, so why not share it with some fun companions. So 12 hours later a few last needs and underwear and socks packed I had 3 friends come join me on my trip to Paris…. Ugh lala, haha, It was one hard drive… I’m not going to lie. We drove over Pyrenees and finally got into Paris after 16 hours. And Paris was soo beautiful. I loved loved it… Not only the City but the Men were very handsome, that I must say. I was literally banging my feeds and falling and tripping over endless benches and other obstacles that had come in my way- of course while my eyes were following these OUGH so many beautiful men. Eye candy that it was!
We ended up not finding a source of internet for hotels, so we just decided to sleep in the car.. Man it was quite crazy. After another 6-7 hours ride we finally made it to Germany, Frankenthal. Ou was I so happy. It was great. My mum cooked for the friends and we had company for 2 days. Which was quite funny, since my friends only spoke Spanish. But yes…. Then I got here and started working almost immediately at the Restaurant. It was great. I needed to find a better money source though, because my others weren’t long nore did I get payed a lot. So my Beautiful Friend Julieee, helped me out so much. She got me hooked up with Promotion jobs were I made in 8 days working about 750 euros, which is amazing. So I was happy. My room I found through “loquo” the Craig list of Spain. How lucky I found a room in Barcelona right were 2 girlfriends live, 330 euros a month utilities included, furnished with a BIG bed… It could not have been any better what a great price. My flight was booked. Everything was great!….
13 of July, 9 hours before my flight goes:
I went to withdrawl money from my Credit Card which I had gotten a month before, the card remained empty with its full amount of 2 G to take out. The plan was perfect.. And maybe I was going to see if my money had come yet from the Promotion jobs I had done (by the way, I worked for Coca- Cola, Michelin Company I had some awesome cool jobs).
I got to the bank, when My mum/ brother calls me and says: We cannot drive you to the Airport ( Which listen this had been a plan since I at least 3 weeks and no one seemed to be bothered by doing so) So I am shoked totally sad. The reasons for why my brother didn’t want to take me was. He didn’t want to wake up the kids this early. Then My mum said she had appointments which weren’t until way later. Basically everyone was being selfish.. And how could u explain… being the great family I had always had. Never accountable or a better word… just never there in need. It felt like a diaper full of shit (excuse my language) smashed into my face. Because since I had been here in Germany I hadn’t felt very welcomed, more bothering and not welcomed. Well Life is tough but you have to take on the cards you are dealed. My family never had been there, when I was homeless and under age no one cared to help, I had no home to go to, and now nothing is going to be different. Well So I cried. I tried to get money out of my account and both my German debit card wasn’t working and neither was the credit card from America. I was shocked, came home, got into big arguments at home, drove to my around and finally went to my grandmas house to settle more thing. Well I ended up coming back home in the middle of the night few hours before I would have had to leave and then I was under a ticking time bomb. Shall I go risking finding out not to have any money right there and then or stay and be on the safe tracks. I couldn’t decide and was very confused. Well I finally said. Andy you are an adventurist- so do it. You’ll find ways. So hopp hopp, my mum drove me al final…. We got there late because of car situations, road works and slow driving of my mum :D they said they wouldn’t except my suitcases. Nice, Then she even said and really we cant really take u either… Shityyy sh shh shh… man So everything that could have gone wrong did, the person that was supposed to help me find jobs had moved to the USA and everything kind of got to me. I after 7 month of adventuring got scared and said, I need a plan B. So here it is… I am going back to America, to my best friend <3, I am going to built my life to that stable cuddle hood and start college al final. And can I tell you I have been so ready to go to school. I am sooo excited and ready. We’ll see what will come out of all. But the next “cheapest” return flight isn’t until end of September beginning October, So what the heck shall I do? Well no worries, miss adventure got some plans. Since my money is stuck for 1 week and half I just decided that I was going to work somewhere cool. Get money while a a great place! - hmm sounds like amazing. Mallorca here I come. Promotion job including board mas o menos… yes enjoy the beach while working! Yes sounds better then the good ol’ german ways… stay tuned!

My girls in Barcelona

Melissa and I

My 2 favorites

And the 2 favs again ;)

Sitges Beach

Barcelona beach, the Spaniards and the foreigners

Love.. Barcelona te quiero

The group ;)

Barca!!

Night, beach and Fullmoon, gathering with friends , spanish music and dancing.. kind of surreal but ouh was it fun.

I miss them

Barcelooooona

She's a fighter- positive attitude great, but not everything can be looked at with those lila-purple glasses on!

　
Hello there, ;)
so it's been a while I know I know.. what can I say, But that I am sorry.
But I got some like always very interesting news about everything.
I just re-read my last blogg entry. I'm a person of good heart to believe everything can be great. But sometimes you just have to take the "purple glasses" off and see that it might be more "gray" then just fun colors behind them. The facts and truth and reality.
As I started wanting to write the very first blogg as a negative one(regarding my new host family), I guess I didn't dare. And so I changed my attitude to "I like the family" there is great possibilities and chances and you just got to see them.
Oi, Oi, OI, now I might even tell myself, don't judge one book by it's cover and only after reading a few pages!
So I am .... man, I'm sorry to tell you. But my new host family- this situation is worse then my other one before hand. I live by the wonderful beach and have a "nice" Au pair mum... it gives me a bit of a "great" sensation. But let me tell you. I was to the point thinking about coming back to the USA sooner. I get 40 dollars a week, cannot afford to pay for a Spanish course, and only talk German with my host family. So what am I getting out of this experience, if it's not learning Spanish? Really it looked like a waste of my time. Not to mention I work 45-55 hours a week counting the night babysitting for 40 euros, and have in 2 weeks only 1 day and a 1/2 day of on the weekend and besides that I work 12 days in a row. The boys only leave to the fathers every other weekend, and so far I had to work the entire time on weekends when they stayed with the mother/us. So I even tried to ask her for a "schedule" so I could plan my time better. And she said she was not liking that idea, because i need to be flexible. She needs that. And so on. That is just using me, so on that weekend the kids are there I have to stay there all day, wait until she says okay I need you to work now, because I can't handle them anymore, or I need to go shopping or no se, a lot more things. So it's been hard, because she told me she wasn't going to need me a lot, when I got this job offer and now??? I became the boys mother. My au pair mum is mo-fr never at home, she goes to work at7 till 2 she gets off and stays away until 7-9 at night, so she sees the boys in bed or when they are sleeping. Not to forget, I cook, I clean, I help, I do this, She even expects me to cook, when she is the only one that will be eating and not the boys( that is just crazy). Not to forget this aspect, which I have been noticing a lot. She can't handle her kids. She starts screaming, yelling at them, blaming the kids that her father left her and she has no money and no nerves. She doesn't consequence the kids, so they don't listen to her. She has cried to me, this lady is in a lifetime crisis. I think she might be seeing a therapist. Which I really do feel bad for her, but the vibe when she is here around the kids is horrible. So last weekend was her turn with the kids. She gave me my schedule- even though she really didn't want to do so. And after that schedule I was off the weekend. Then Thursday after making plans she says. I will be going out on Saturday and need you to look after the kids and baby-sit and on Sunday you need to wake up with them so I can sleep until around 11ish. So I am like wtf, you just told me I had off and I already made plans. So okay I just excepted it, didn't complain just whatever. Then i get there Saturday night when she wanted me to be home, and she says. oh by the way I want to stay the night in Barcelona. So please watch the kids on Sunday is that alright!? I said, yes you had told me to watch them either way Sunday until 12 so that's okay. Then she said with tears in her eyes. Well I won't be back by then. WTFFFFF, So I said, well what time will you be back because I made plans to meet my girlfriends at the beach. She said: I don't know, I feel like I live with my mother and have to giver her an exact time when to be back. (wtf, I am your worker, not your husband, or the mother of the kids mother, I need a working schedule, I am not your slave needing to be available whenever you want and need, that is abusing and using and wrong, and who the f*** even says that??? That is crazy!!!! - I have been nothing but respectful and nice). (by the way this is my 4 time trying to ask for a schedule, because everyone gets one. That’s how it is, all au pairs I know have one) So I am like, okay whatever I will just tell them I can't go. She said, no, no I just will come back home. I said: Well this is stupid (because she was almost crying like a child) just go out have fun, and we'll talk about it some other time. She said see I need your flexibility I just found out today about my friends' plan and that's the way the Spanish people are last minute. You have mo-fr in the mornings off to socialize, this is my weekend. Excuse me doesn't she have Mo-fr from 2 till 8 o'clock off, she choose to have kids, and therefore they occupy her free time, but that is not my problem. I have to work from 3-9 so that is my work... and of course the other time is off. And who socializes in the morning?! Really. So tell me mo-fr the mum wakes the kids up and is with them for an hour. mo-fr she mostly never sees them until they are in bed or already sleeping. She is 2-3 h with her kids at the maximum with her kids mo-fr and the weekend she has them, she doesn't want to be with them either. And then the other weekend they are gone. Are you fucking kidding me. So there then here I realized, this woman is just crazy, she is depressed, she is definitely abusing me. And I am done, done, done....she is soo abusing my time! (the child is sick now and I got to work from 7 am till 9 pm now until it's healthy again... are you kidding me?) So therefore I decided it was probably time to come back. -so now the next problem- How would i even afford to come home?! (40 euros a week? laugh a flight is almost 600 dollars) - my parents don't help me out- they haven't since I was 18- no money nothing. I do have a source of help, but I can't take it. I am too independent and just can't! Sorry. So my next thought was, well I guess I got to go back to Germany and work and live with my Mum for a while. Which really- I already know German, and that would just be... I guess my last resort, but for all it means- My thoughts and tendency all went to: I just need to get a job here in espana. So I looked onto this page, which it is a great little classify called "loquo" kind of like Craigslist and there you have work offers, apartments, roommates, ect... so as I looked through there, I realized it might be easier then I thought to find a job- Especially since I have heard of Au pair's getting a job easily. My Spanish is mas o menos well, I understand a lot, but I don't speak very well. But a bit, so let's do this. With English and German knowledge, I got something to offer. Well there comes the next problem. I need to have money for the first month or two to stay in an apartment, because If I find a job, I'll need to move out right then. Soooo, next problem. Where to get the money from. I got a pretty.. well funny Idea. I can't share it until it happened and is over. but stay tuned. Man, life, life, life (viva la vida loca)... But this is my year, why should I have someone ruin this year for me because they are abusing my time and I am not even learning Spanish with this family. the mum is nice and I get along with her well when the boys aren't around, but she has mental issues, it's a negative, weird vibe when she is there. The 9 year old boy even ran away from her. She has no control!! I feel bad, but just because someone is living in a pity, I don’t want to be dragged a long. For all it means if I'd stay here longer I'd go down in this place. And I am not trying to... So people. New adventure again... 3rd time is a charm. I am a fighter and I will find a way!..... stay tuned!!!!!!!!!!!

(for now I am just trying to enjoy every spare time possible to not be there and to keep my self content and going! -knowing why I am fighting to stay in barcelona, because I love it here!)